Quick MOVIES! IDIOT BOX! SPORTS! Update

So, apparently having a job that I kinda/sorta actually enjoy is a bit different than having one I'm intentionally trying to tank.

If you'll recall, when I first started this blog I was essentially a posting machine. Guess one can do that if they're busy writing blog posts at work instead of, you know, working. Who knew? In any case, the blog has definitely fallen by the wayside. Like almost into nothingness. But, I'm not ready to shut it down completely. I own the domain for another year at least.  [And I'm still more prolific than MEG]

Anyway, what to expect going forward: a few posts per month (more if I'm feeling ambitious), in more of the "quick-hit" variety.

MOVIES!

(1) The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
(2) Les Miserables
(3) Django Unchained

After many fits and starts, the first of the trilogy movie adaptation of The Hobbit comes to the big screen as it was meant to: in Peter Jackson's capable hands.

Originally, Jackson was slated to write the screenplay and "consult" with Guillermo del Toro directing. Del Toro apparently got pretty far along in pre-production (like a full year) before pulling the plug. In swoops Jackson to rescue the project and save the day. And, really, could any other director have done these movies? Only Jackson could recreate the world of Middle Earth with the care required after the brilliant Lord of the Rings Trilogy.

My nerd friends and I saw it in IMAX 3D HFR on the Saturday of opening weekend. There have been plenty of complaints. That Jackson is just squeezing money out of the franchise by stretching out to three movies. That the HFR is shitty. That there are too many characters. That it's too long.

Notwithstanding these complaints (and a few of my own), I enjoyed Part I immensely. The best part was clearly the British actor playing Bilbo, Martin Freeman. He was just perfect. He had the mannerisms down pat. The angst at being invaded and eaten out of house-and-home by the dwarves? Also perfect. Rejecting the opportunity to join the quest only to slowly (then very abruptly) realize it was what he was looking for? Pretty great.

The movie is long but I barely felt the length. The dwarves are exceedingly numerous and a bit difficult to keep track of but that's the fault of the source material, not the filmmakers. There was also a bit of "Lucas-ification" of some of the CGI aspects, specifically the Goblin King, who looked like he could have come out of Episode I central casting (not a good thing). That said, I didn't really have a problem with the other CGI-based character, the Orc Azog the Defiler. He was actually kind of bad ass.

Some people didn't like the "getting-the-gang-back-together" vibe with Agent Smith, Galadriel, Rivendell, etc. I personally thought it was great. As were the tie-ins to Sauron the Necromancer, which will, of course, be significant in seventy-so odd years.

I didn't really notice the HFR though one of my friends branded it The. Worst. Thing. Ever.  All in all, a solid A-/B+ and I'm really looking to the next one, especially if the subtitle is at-all explanatory (The Desolation of Smoag).  DRAGONS!

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I had much trepidation going into Tom Hooper's (The King's Speech) big screen adaptation of Les Mis.  I'm in the weird spot of being ridiculously familiar with the stage show's music and songs, without having ever actually seen it.

From junior high to now, I've listened to the Original Cast Recording and the Tenth Anniversary Concert Recording countless times. My concern going in (not completely allayed) was that I wouldn't be able to concentrate on the movie due to constantly thinking how different the voices were to the voices I knew. Especially Colm Wilkenson!

So, on to the movie.  I really enjoyed it. Having never seen the stage show other than via the televised PBS anniversary concerts it was really cool to finally see some visual interpretation of how the songs fit into the overall setting/story. Fantine's tragic descent during "I Dreamed a Dream" is especially more dramatic and sad having actually seen what happens to her during the song. And, Anne Hathaway absolutely kills it. She deserves all the award season accolades she's getting. It would be shocking to see her fail to win her first Oscar.

Much has been made of the director's decision to film the movie with live singing, as opposed to lip-synching and post-production studio recordings of the songs. It completely works. The acting benefits greatly from this new idea. The different emotions of the actors while they're singing comes across much better this way than the standard way.

As for the individual cast members, Hugh Jackman is tremendous and, in any year where Daniel Day Lewis was not playing Abraham Lincoln, he'd likely win the Best Actor Academy Award. Russell Crowe. Well. He's not as bad as everyone is saying. It helps that is character is meant to be stern and stoic. His voice chops simply aren't there though. I mean, in the rights hands, "Stars" is one of my favorite songs from any musical. Crowe's Javert simply cannot do it justice. 

For those curious, here's the gold standard of "Stars":

Eddie Redmayne had a surprisingly good voice but does have the chin-quiver thing while singing. Amanda Seyfried was only okay. But she's a member of TGS's famouse Y&P! Club, so she gets a pic:

Yes and Please!!!

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The last of the Christmas-season releases I saw was Tarantino's fabulous Django Unchained. This is what moviemaking should be: extremely pleasing to the audience while also superb in nearly every technical aspect.

This is right up there as among the best movies I saw in 2012. Tarantino simply does not fuck around. Like not even a little. Django is much more action-packed than its predecessor, Inglorious Basterds, yet still features his exquisite, technical filmmaking.

Nearly every part is perfectly acted. I don't love Jamie Fox, either as a person or as an actor, but he plays Django exactly as he should. Christoph Waltz kills yet another character that Quentin seemingly wrote just for him. Don Johnson? Awesome. Walton Goggins? Ummm....okay!! Leo crushes the bad-guy role and Samuel L. Jackson absolutely steals the entire movie as Candie's Stockholm-Syndrome head house slave, Stephen.

This is a bloody, violent film. It's about pre-Civil War America. The "N-Word" features prominently, as some of you might have heard. I was not distracted by it in the least. In fact, I think it's a pretty believable portrayal of how the word was used in those times (if not to such a voluminous extent).

As with any Tarantino movie, the cinematography is sublime, the music/song choices fit in impeccably and add a ton to what you see on the screen and the dialogue is as snappy as we've come to expect.

I'll agree with one of the Half in the Bag guys and concede that, if there was a weakness, it is that the movie had what felt like a great "natural" ending point but still blazed on for another half hour.  It is on the long side but I don't mind staying past the "natural" time in Tarantino's world.

THE IDIOT BOX!

(1) Continuum

(2) Happy Endings

The post-holiday network hiatus is at an end, meaning not only do all the normal shows come back with new episodes, but also the appearance of some winter premieres (Justified! Archer!), old shows on new channels (Hello TBS, CougarTown!), and completely new shows. Of the latter category, I'll be checking out Fox's The Following but, thus far, have only agreed to put Continuum in the standard rotation. After being repeatedly told to check it out, I also added Happy Endings to a regular spot in the ol' DVR.

If you're looking for a new Sci-Fi show, I highly recommend (based only on the first two episodes), SyFy's new one, Continuum.

The story: it's 2077 and corporations have displaced sovereign nations as the rulers of the world. The world these corporations run is a little on the Nazi-side of governing principles giving rise to (of course) a rebel group called Liber8.  See what they did there? Well, they blow up the "Corporate Congress" (at the same time killing tens of thousands of innocents), get caught and are sentenced to be executed.

At their execution, they've got other ideas. One of them throws...well...something into the device set to kill them which instead creates some sort of portal that they all disappear into. 

And, not alone!!! See, the future has super cops called "Protectors". Our main character, Kiera, is one such Protector. And she gets caught up in the portal and sent with the Liber8 leaders to...wait for it...almost there... 2012!!!  Dun-dun-DUNNNN!

And, oh by the way, Kiera is played by Rachel Nichols, definitely Y&P worthy.

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How did I ignore the calls to watch Happy Endings before now? More importantly, WHY?!?! It is, joke-for-joke, the funniest show on television. The jokes are just as fast and furious as on Archer but not with the obscurity some of the jokes in the latter feature. There's not much to say about the plot. It's six young professionals, living in Chicago, and being ridiculous. It's also on cancellation watch so, if you haven't, PLEASE START WATCHING THIS SHOW!!!!!

This also features a long-time member of the Y&P Club, Elisha Cuthbert...

Yes and Please 1!

As well as a new candidate for membership, Eliza Coupe...

Yes and Please 2!

SPORTS!

(1) Da Bears Enter the NFL's 21st Century

(2)HAR-BOWL 2013

Chicago's long nightmare is over. Lovie Smith = Fired! QB and offensively-focused Marc Trestman = Hired! Never again will we need to look upon the personification of confused looks during a Chicago Bears game.

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I don't know if Trestman is the right hire. He's never been a head coach in the NFL but has head coaching experience...but in the Canadian Football League. That said, he's had tremendous success up North, winning back-to-back Grey Cups and generally churning out successful teams on the offensive side of the ball.

This is a necessary change for the Bears organization. The modern, Goddell-era NFL is geared to the offenses. A good defense is a nice thing to have but the old adage really does not ring true any more. To be sure, most of this year's playoff teams have good defenses. That's simply not sufficient anymore. Almost all of them also have dynamic offenses, capable of scoring a lot of points in a lot of different ways.

In Jay Cutler, the Bears have a QB with franchise-QB talent. He's had what, four (?) different offensive coordinators and systems (none of them good) in his time here? Trestman eschewed from the Lovie-esque, Beat Green Bay, rah-rah, pandering and went instead with a focus to get players who love the game of football, rushing the QB and protecting the QB. He might look like a complete nerd but I like what I've heard so far.

Oh, and GM Phil Emery being allowed to can Lovie after a 10-6 season? Thus proving he's really the man in charge and not Ted Phillips or a McCasky? That's pretty damn sweet too.

Welcome to the modern NFL, Bears fans!

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IT. IS. ON.

For the record, I am 100% all-in for the 49ers. Not because of Jim Harbaugh's Michigan and Bears connections (though those don't hurt). Nor do I have anything against John Harbaugh. I actually like him and think they are both top-5 NFL coaches right now.

No, what I'm hoping for is for someone, anyone, to please send Ray Lewis off into retirement, sans another Super Bowl ring.  PLEASE!

Yes and Please! "Dear GOD" Edition

In which Kate Upton gets as close to a porn screenshot as she likely ever is (1:40 mark).

Screen grab of the money shots:

On Susan Rice

If the Democrats can be allowed to filibuster John Bolton's appointment as GWB's US Ambassador to the United Nations based on nothing more than ideology (which they were), then the GOP can certainly filibuster Susan Rice's potential appointment as Secretary of State based on her post-Benghazi Sunday show performances which were, at best, grossly incompetent (RACIST!) or, at worst, willfully misleading.

She has a history of the latter being the case.

Courtesy of National Review Online

Movies! Skyfall

Is an aging 007 still necessary, or even relevant, in an age of cyber-terrorism and non-state actors? Is MI-6? Is the Double-O program?

That's the main question asked by the first third of Skyfall, the twenty-third installment of the fifty year-old James Bond series.

The answer? As one M says to another (more on that later), no matter who the enemy is, they're always there, lurking in the shadows. And only by operating there, in the shadows, can MI-6 and James Bond protect God and country from the threats they pose.

With Skyfall, the franchise is alive and well in Daniel Craig's more-than-capable hands.




Now, I'm not the Quantum of Solace hater that most are. I believe the opening action/chase sequence is among the best ever done. The Tosca opera scene is fantastic.

Dominic Green is a perfectly serviceable, if bland, bad guy. The relationship between Bond and Mathis was a poignant highlight. And it also has Gemma Arterton who is, wait for it... Definitely "Yes and Please!" worthy.

But Quantum of Solace was also a deeply flawed film from a story standpoint. Critics trashed it and it seemed that all of the momentum from the Casino Royale reboot had disappeared. Though, to be fair, a lot of this was due to the writer's strike, which ended just before production began, meaning that filming started with an incomplete script.

Nevertheless, as with Die Another Day, after Quantum of Solace, yet another fresh take would be needed to jolt the franchise. Enter director Sam Mendes, not exactly known for action movies. Then the MGM bankruptcy hit and it looked as though 007 might never be seen again. Luckily for fans, the bankruptcy issues got resolved and Bond returns as good as ever.

This is certainly Craig's best Bond movie (yes, even better than Casino Royale) and maybe the best since Goldeneye, from a critical perspective.  [Note: The World is Not Enough is actually my favorite Brosnan one but I recognize I'm certainly the minority viewpoint on this score].

Some of the reviews are a little overblown, however. This is not "The Best Bond Ever!" but it is excellent on its own merits.

[Spoilers Ahead]

The movie begins with a complicated chase set piece set in Istanbul. Bond, with the help of another agent, Eve (more on her later), chases some shadowy villain-assassin-type person who has just killed another agent (Ronson) and stolen a critical hard drive.

Bond and Eve are in constant communication with MI-6 HQ and M (played again, awesomely, by Judy Dench) and, as such, we learn that the hard drive contained the real identities of every NATO undercover agent throughout the world.

Bond, having been sent to secure the drive and arriving too late, engages in a fantastically-shot motorcycle chase with the bad guy through the streets and rooftops of Istanbul (a little Bourne-ish actually, but that's not a bad thing), while Eve follows along in her own SUV. Eventually Bond and the bad guy end up fighting on top of a moving train. Bond is shot by the bad guy somewhere in here but not severely enough to give up the fight. Eve gets ahead of the train and sets up to shoot, sniper-style, but can't get a clear shot with the two of them fighting. She conveys such to M and after some back-and-forth, M shouts "Take the bloody shot!!"  Eve does, seeming to hit 007, who falls from the train into the river below (natch), presumably dead, while the bad guy gets away with the list. Cue opening credits.

The loss of the NOC list is, quite obviously and as our Vice President would say, "A big fucking deal."  A new government functionary, Gareth Mallory, played by Ralph Fiennes (who is never not awesome), has been charged with calling in M and politely informing her that her, uh, "retirement" will be happening three months hence. M, understandably, is not happy, not wanting to leave "The Service" in worse shape than when she found it. Nevertheless, it looks like she's on her way out.

On the way back to MI-6 HQ, she and her right hand man, Tanner, learn that someone is trying to access the NOC list. Tanner initiates a trace of the source and it appears that it is coming from...inside MI-6! From M's own computer! M's car is detained on the bridge, with a full view of HQ when, all of a sudden, the top floors of MI-6 explode! Someone wanted M to see this, she darkly concludes.

Bond, not dead, is laying low on some beach, drinking himself into oblivion, playing dangerous drinking games that involve avoiding scorpion stings while taking shots and engaging in what is likely lots and lots of the sex with someone who we don't really get a good look at and whose name we never learn. Pity. She looked pretty hot. In any event, Bond sees a CNN story about the MI-6 bombing and crawls out of the "grave" and heads home.

MI-6 is moved to new, temporary digs in Churchill's old bunker. Bond is put through a battery of tests, physical and psychological, before being allowed back into field duty. His results are, shall we say, less than stellar. M "passes" him anyway. He also performs a little self surgery, discovering that when he was shot in Istanbul, the bullet was made from depleted uranium. Of course, only a few thugs-for-hire use this kind of ammunition and MI-6 is quickly able to identify the thief of the NOC list as Patrice. They quickly determine that Patrice will soon be in Shanghai for another job so Bond jets off there to follow him.

Before heading back out into the field we're introduced to the new head of Q Branch, played by Ben Whishaw. He looks all of about twelve and Bond makes some snarky remarks about it. They have some good back-and-forth and seem to get on the same page. The only gadgets Bond gets are a new PPK, coded to be used only by him (shades of the License to Kill sniper rifle) and a small radio beacon Bond can activate to later establish his location. On to China!

The establishing shots of Shanghai are amazing, to say the least. And those blue-lit highways the Chinese have got going on there? Pretty cool.

Bond trails Patrice to a high-rise, where the latter is setting up to kill someone in the building across the way. He does so but then catches a glimpse of Bond and they fight! It's a really cool scene, what with the backlighting from the ads on the building facade, that invokes both the Vader/Luke fight at the end of Empire and the end part of Beatrix's fight with the Crazy-88 in Kill Bill I. Bond wins but is unable to get the name of Patrice's employer out of him before he falls to his death. Bond finds a chip to a Macau casino in Patrice's case, payment for the job. And also spots a hot brunette from across the way who has been watching the whole thing. Methinks we'll see her again.

Macau. Bond is shaving in his lux hotel when Eve unexpectedly drops by. They engage in some sexually charged banter while she assists him in shaving. It's purposely left ambiguous as to whether they bang. Eve (Naomie Harris), BTW, looks like this:

Not too bad, if you're into to her type of thing. Generally I'm not so she fails to get Y&P! treatment. Sorry Naomi.

007 heads to the casino. It's the shot of him on the boat traveling through a Chinese light festival that was in the trailer. Nevertheless, it's a cool entrance shot.  The casino is also pretty cool in an Asian mafia, dark room, sketchy-things-going-on-here kinda way.  There's also a pit with Komodo Dragons so you just know Bond will end up in that pit before the night is over.

Bond cashes in his chip and gets a few million Euros for his (Patrice's) trouble. It's apparent, however, that the "House" does not anticipate him leaving with the cash alive. Bond spots the brunette from Shanghai and maneuvers her to the bar from some chit-chat about her boss. This leads to the "What do you know about fear?" conversation from the trailers and Sévérine, as we learn to be her name, convincingly conveys the terror she feels for whomever her "boss" is. In any event, she tells Bond he'll likely be killed before leaving the casino but if he happens to live to join her on a boat that will take them to meet the Big Bad.

Speaking of Sévérine, another Yes and Please entry into Bond Girl lore:

Cue casino fight scene. Cue Bond and bad guy redshirt falling into lizard pit. Cue redshirt getting eaten by lizard. Cue Bond arriving at boat, and surprising Severine in the shower. Porn music ensues and the banging occurs off-camera.

Now it's finally time to meet the Big Bad. The crew of the boat turns out to be a group of his henchman so, upon arriving at deserted Chinese island, Bond and Sévérine are taken captive and separated.  Bond is bound to a chair in a room filled with servers and Javier Bardem's finally Silva makes his grand entrance, regaling Bond with a parable about rats on an island and who among the last two will end up surviving. He's menacing alright and played quite brilliantly by Bardem but his plan boils down to simple revenge on M for something he blames her for in his past.  And, here we are with half the plot of The World is Not Enough. At least there was a motive in addition to revenge on M. Here, Silva's sole motivation seems to be M-centric. Oh well. Silva kills Sévérine after a particularly twisted "game" but Bond, having activated his little radio thing-a-ma-jig has alerted the cavalry and Silva is apprehended and whisked away to MI-6 captivity.

It's here that we learn the backstory. Back when M was head of MI-6 Hong Kong Silva worked for her as a hacker against the Chinese government. Turns out Silva got a little too aggressive and started pissing off the wrong Chinese officials. This happening just before the British-to-PRC handover so M gave him up to the Chi-Coms in exchange for the return of six British agents and a smooth transition. Apparently, Silva thought this to be some kind of betrayal. Who woulda thought! He underwent a lot of torture at the hand of his Chinese overlords but still didn't give up anything. He tried to off himself with his cyanide pill but it didn't work, with "life clinging to him like a disease."

It's at this point that the story veers a bit into "unbelievable" territory as the extraordinarily complicated nature of Silva's plan starts to take shape. M goes off to Westminster to testify (read: get a' whippin') in front of the intel committee (of which Mallory is a member). At the same time, Q is trying to hack into Silva's system but, after a few minutes, it becomes clear that Silva has "pulled a Joker" and meant to get caught just so his computer would get plugged into MI-6's system. This allows his computer to unlock free him from his cell and he escapes. Silva then makes his way through various underground tunnels into the Tube, with Bond in pursuit, only to escape Bond and head over to Westminster.  I'm not saying this is Episodes 1-3 Palpatine complicated but pretty complicated nonetheless.

Silva gets there just ahead of Bond, points his gun at M and...HESITATES EVER SO SLIGHTLY TO RELISH THE MOMENT which is, of course, just enough time for someone to yank M down for cover, for Bond to burst in, for a shootout to result and for Bond and M to escape. Nice job Silva!

ASS!!!!!

Anyway, Bond decides that everything has been happening according to Silva's plan so it's time to change the game. Namely, go off the grid and basically "kidnap" M up to Scotland, to where he grew up, an estate named "Skyfall". I GET IT! It's at this point that the movie turns into "James Bond is: HOME ALONE!" as, knowing they will be vastly outnumbered, they boobytrap the house in an attempt to even the odds a bit.

Silva's men come in two waves. The booby-traps basically cut down the first wave, while Silva arrives in a helicopter with a second wave. We get the nearly-every-movie obligatory "Bond was in the Royal Navy, let's put him underwater with a bad guy redshirt for a long time" scene. We get Silva's final showdown with M, breaking down that his moment of revenge is at hand and, through tears, demanding that she pull the trigger as he holds the gun up to both their heads. We get the surprise "OOF! I'm dead from behind!" look on Silva's face as Bond has crept up and thrown a knife in his back. "Who's the last rat standing now?" Bond snarks as Silva falls to his death. Indeed.

M, however, was injured in the initial wave of attacks and dies. Bond cries. And fade to future...

AND ZOMG EVE'S LAST NAME IS MONEYPENNY! AND MALLORY IS THE NEW M! GET IT? MALLORY STARTS WITH AN "M"!

I kid but it's actually a pretty good setup and, while we all mourn Judy Dench's passing of the torch, I doubt any Bond fan is disappointed with Fiennes installed as the new, future M.  All in all, a much cleaner and complete reboot of the franchise than Casino Royale.

And, of course, "007 WILL RETURN"!

Overall Grade: A.

Extras:

• My good friend and fellow Bond aficionado @GregGoodman runs one of the biggest Bond sits on the Interwebs.  Check it out at www.universalexports.net
  
• I agree with Greg that I didn't love Adele's Skyfall when it was initially released (even though I am a huge Adele fan). But when tied to the actual opening credits sequence, it's great.  As my buddy with whom I saw this pointed out, however, the credit sequence does kind of telegraph the ending scenes.
  
• No Felix Leiter? BOO! There's a passing reference to MI-6 still having "some friends" in the CIA and I'm sure that this reference is meant to refer to him but still!
  
• Also agree with Greg that all the MI-6 people calling M "mum" is WAY overdone in this movie. It's been present in the previous ones but not to this extent. It's a bit distracting and more than a few of them sound ridiculous for the situation.
  
• The use of the old school Aston Martin is also awesome. As is M's retort of essentially "Oh yes, this is much more inconspicuous."
  
• Best humor line: "I guess he was keen to get home" from an extra during the Tube chase scene.

Previews, Jerry, Previews!

We saw previews for Django Unchained, Zero Dark Thirty, A Good Day to Die Hard, Identity Thief (looks TERRIBLE), The Last Stand (AH-NALD being old and also looking terrible), Gangster Squad and Iron Man 3.

All but Identity Thief and The Last Stand Below.  FWIW, many, many people were laughing hysterically at the Identity Thief one. My fellow countryman are fucking idiots.

4 Benghazi Questions from Pitchfork Pat

Pat Buchanan is a complex fellow. We on the Right have our ups and downs with him. He did admirable work in the Reagan Administration and, for years, was an intellectual heavyweight in the advocacy of conservatism.

Then he challenged President Bush (41) in the 1992 GOP primaries, garnering enough support to seriously damage Bush's general election candidacy.  His primary strength also forced the Bushies to give him a primetime convention speech where he delivered his famous "Culture War" speech, which certainly didn't do the President's reelection chances any favors either.

As for his status as an intellectual leader of the conservative movement, he's damaged himself in recent years by drawing dangerously close to the line of anti-semitism and racism in his writings, as well as apologia for Hitler and Stalin.

Nevertheless, his piece today on Benghazi  offers four of the most succinctly important questions that need to be answered with respect to the Benghazi scandal (and now that sex-pacades are involved, its seems the MSM can finally call it a scandal).  These questions are:

1. Why were repeated warnings from Benghazi about terrorist activity in the area ignored and more security not provided, despite urgent pleas from Stevens and others at the consulate?
   
2. Why was the U.S. military unable to come to the rescue of our people begging for help, when the battle in Benghazi lasted on and off for seven hours?
   
3. Who, if anyone, gave an order for forces to “stand down” and not go to the rescue of the consulate compound or the safe house? A week before Petraeus’ resignation, the CIA issued a flat denial that any order to stand down ever came from anyone in the agency.
   
4. Fourth, when the CIA knew it was a terrorist attack, why did Jay Carney on Sept. 13, David Petraeus to Congress on Sept. 14, UN Amb. Susan Rice on Sept 16 on five TV shows, and Obama before the UN two weeks after 9/11 all keep pushing what the CIA knew was a false and phony story: That it had all come out of a spontaneous protest of an anti-Islamic video made by some clown in California?